The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, the older worker had had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?" he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won't be able to wheel back." "You're on, old man," the young guy replied. The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then he turned to the young man and said, "Alright. Get in."
After an inspiring khutba, one of the Muslim brothers greeted the Imam “ ‘Imam, that was a wonderful khutba. You should have it published.’ “The Imam replied, ‘Actually, I’m planning to have all my Khutbas published posthumously.’ “ ‘Great!’ gushed the Muslim Brother. ‘The sooner the better!’ ”
One day Hamza and Rahman went to a job interview, the boss came out of his office and gave them a test. Well, it took about two hours to finish the test. The boss picked them up and graded them. When he finished, he came back out of his office and said, "You both did very well and passed the test. In fact you scored the same grade." Then he told Hamza he got the job. All of a sudden Rahman jumped up and said, "Well wait, if we both scored the same grade, them why does Hamza get the job?" Then the boss said, "Well because of your answers, for example, on number 25, Hamza wrote, 'I don't know,' and you wrote, 'me either."
One afternoon President Hosni Mubarak was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.He asked one man "Why are you eating grass?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass.""Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you" the lawyer said. But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree." "Bring them along," the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us also."The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!" "Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you." The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place - the grass is almost a foot high!"