Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Strength

At a gathering where Mullah Nasruddin was present, people were discussing the merits of youth and old age. They had all agreed that, a man's strength decreases as years go by. Mullah Nasruddin dissented.
- I don't agree with you gentlemen, he said. In my old age I have the same strength as I had in the prime of my youth.
- How do you mean, Mullah Nasruddin? asked somebody. Explain yourself.
- In my courtyard, explained Mullah Nasruddin, there is a massive stone. In my youth I used to try and lift it. I never succeeded. Neither can I lift it now.

Monday, August 28, 2006

From each according to his ability to each according to his needs

As Nasruddin emerged form the mosque after prayers, a beggar sitting on the street solicited alms. The following conversation followed:
- Are you extravagant? asked Nasruddin.
- Yes Nasruddin. replied the beggar.
- Do you like sitting around drinking coffee and smoking? asked Nasruddin.
- Yes. replied the beggar.
- I suppose you like to go to the baths everyday? asked Nasruddin.
- Yes. replied the beggar.
- ...And maybe amuse yourself, even, by drinking with friends? asked Nasruddin.
- Yes I like all those things. replied the beggar.
- Tut, Tut, said Nasruddin, and gave him a gold piece.
A few yards farther on. another beggar who had overheard the conversation begged for alms also.
- Are you extravagant? asked Nasruddin.
- No, Nasruddin replied second beggar.
- Do you like sitting around drinking coffee and smoking? asked Nasruddin.
- No. replied second beggar.
- I suppose you like to go to the baths everyday? asked Nasruddin.
- No. replied second beggar.
- ...And maybe amuse yourself, even, by drinking with friends? asked Nasruddin.
- No, I want to only live meagerly and to pray. replied second beggar.
Whereupon the Nasruddin gave him a small copper coin.
- But why, wailed second beggar, do you give me, an economical and pious
man, a penny, when you give that extravagant fellow a sovereign?
Ah my friend, replied Nasruddin, his needs are greater than yours.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Stick to your story

How old are you, Mullah nasruddin?"

"Forty."

"But you said that two years ago when I asked."

"That's right and I always stand by my word!"

Monday, August 21, 2006

Strep

I am sorry about failing to post regularly i have been battling with strep. Inshallah this week i will do much better.

Salam

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Getting Inside the problem

There was once a small boy who banged a drum all day and loved every moment of it. He would not be quiet, no matter what anyone else said or did. Various people who called themselves Scholars, and other well-wishers, were called in by neighbors and asked to do something about the child.The first so-called Scholar told the boy that he would, if he continued to make so much noise, perforate his eardrums; this reasoning was too advanced for the child, who was neither a scientist nor a scholar. The second told him that drum beating was a sacred activity and should be carried out only on special occasions. The third offered the neighbors plugs for their ears; the fourth gave the boy a book; the fifth gave the neighbors books that described a method of controlling anger through biofeedback; the sixth gave the boy meditation exercises to make him placid and explained that all reality was imagination. Like all placebos, each of these remedies worked for a short while, but none worked for very long.Eventually, Nasruddin came along. He looked at the situation, handed the boy a hammer and chisel, and said, "I wonder what is INSIDE the drum?"

Monday, August 14, 2006

Overheard

I think this is only funny if you grew up in The united states but i overheard this commnet at wedding recently
" I don't agree with al-queda, but now all those guys who beat me up in High School are afraid of me."

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Protection

There was a Imam whose wife was expecting a baby. The Imam went to the congregation and asked for a raise. After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that when the Imam's family expanded, so would his pay check.After five or six children, this started to get expensive. The congregation decided to hold a meeting again to discuss the Imam's pay situation. You can imagine there was much yelling and bickering. Finally, the Imam got up and spoke to the crowd, "Having children is an act of Allah!"In the back of the room, a little old man with a full beard stood up, and in his frail voice said... "Snow and Rain are also 'acts of Allah', but when we get too much, we wear Protection!"

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Taxi Drivers go to Paradise

Mullah Nasruddien dies due to old age. Upon entering heaven’s gate, there is another man in front, waiting to go into heaven. The Angel asks the man, "What is your name what did you accomplish during your life?". The man responds "My name is Abdulrahman Muhammed, and I was a Taxi driver in Lahore Pakistan for 14 years" "Very well," says The Angel, "Here is your silk robe and golden scepter, now you may walk in the streets of Paradise." The Angel looks at the Mullah, and asks "What is your name and what did you accomplish?" He responds, "I'm Mullah Nasruddien , and have devoted the last 62 years to Allah". "Very well," says The Angel, "Here is your cotton robe and wooden staff, you may enter." "Wait a minute," says Mullah Nasruddien, "You gave the taxi driver a silk robe and golden scepter, why did I only get a cotton robe and wooden staff?". "Well," The Angel replied, "We work on a performance scale, you see while you preached, everyone slept, when he drove taxis, everyone prayed!"